‘Sweet Jesus’: Kmart product shocks Kiwi buyers

The Kmart website describes the item as something to “massage your shoulders, neck and back”. Photo / RNZ
Kiwis have turned to Facebook to share their surprise and confusion about a new Kmart product release in the retailer’s sports section and billed as “perfect for relaxing after a long day”.
Taking to the popular group Kmart & The Warehouse Hacks & Decor NZ, which has over 280,000 members, one woman made a post about the retailer’s new product, a “Vibration Massager”.
The item, which features a small, grey balled head and a long black handle, is described on the website as something to “massage your shoulders, neck and back” and is said to be “perfect for relaxing after a long day of work”.
It’s available to buy online for $10 — “follow usage instructions carefully”, shoppers are warned on the site — and is listed as being stocked in store at the Australian retailer’s Sylvia Park, Botany, St Luke and Papatoetoe branches.
Though seemingly an innocent product, many users of the Facebook group took to the comment section to make light of the device and point out the visual similarities to many popular sexual vibrators.
Sharing a picture of the $10 item, the woman wrote, “Damn Kmart. That’s gonna sell well”, with a laughing emoji, prompting hundreds of reactions from group members.
“What aisle would it be? Asking for a friend,” one person wrote, along with laughing emojis.
Another person remarked, “sweet Jesus I had to check what group I was in”.
“Anyone know if it’s waterproof? Asking for a friend,” one woman joked.
While many were quick to make light of the massager, others were confused over the purpose of the product.
“I saw this advertised the other day too and had to click on it and go onto it to see what the description said,” one woman wrote.
“What does it massage??” Another wrote.
“Where do you use it, asking for a friend”, one person joked.
Regardless of the intended use for the item, it appears to be a bestseller with several stores across the country sold out of it already, despite it being released only recently.
The Herald has approached Kmart for comment.
It comes after a Hamilton mother visited Chemist Warehouse’s Sylvia Park store in Auckland in July and was horrified to find a display of sex toys in the same aisle as lip liners.
Speaking to the Herald, the woman said at first she thought they were face vibrators created to clean your pores before realising they were vibrators.
Because the woman was with her 16-year-old daughter and her daughter’s friend, she said, “I was mortified.”
“I was shocked, absolutely shocked to see something like that in Chemist Warehouse, right next to all the lip glosses.”
Despite the product having “sensitive” packaging and no “explicit signage or information explaining the nature of the item”, the woman complained to the company because she believed the display could cause “moral, ethical or physical harm to children”.
It’s unclear if Chemist Warehouse has removed or relocated the product from its shelves.
Chemist Warehouse isn’t the only non-specialised Kiwi retailer to sell sex toys. Life Pharmacy sells a range of vibrators. Woolworths stocks the Durex Play Accessory Delight Vibrating Bullet, while beauty chain Sephora has an array of models.